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Gallia Pad
Hystrix
post Mar 2 2011, 06:45 AM
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I need a lot of work and a lot of advice, so this is what this thread is for. I'll be putting a lot of my stuff down here, and it will be all open for comments. Very simple. I hope you enjoy reading, and please share your thoughts whenever you can. (IMG:style_emoticons/blue/sealed.gif)

QUOTE(Recruitment)


Gallia is in a state of decline. It has been more than a year since King Solan's disappearance, and no hint or sign of the lion's whereabouts remained to be seen. The Council of Elders continued to lead the country at the King's absence, although the past seasons riled many citizens to seriously question the "guidance" they've offered. Even during Solan's reign, the Elders enjoyed a freedom far beyond their intended bounds, nothing they have ever experienced in the time of Caineghis and Skirmir. Several of them ran rampant with their abuses; they seized lands unfairly, drafted personal forces straight from the standing army, and started to enforce their own sphere of control amongst the populace.

The Council tried to convince the people that they're still the ones that can provide the protection their king could not. But when a vocal faction of laguz reminded the council that it was past time for a new tournament to select a king, the request was oddly padded away after a time. As if these Elders forgot what it truly meant to rule these lands.

A few months ago, a volcanic disaster struck and crippled Goldoa, Gallia's southern neighbor and long-time ally. People offered as much as they could to support their dragon brothers, though any request for official action from the council was only met with indecision. This turned out to be the last straw, as the clear Council has lost touch of their people and world around them. To that end, a small faction of beasts have banded together in order to end this reign by their own hands, and honor their alliance with the dragons. The Gallian way meant that the strongest fought for their right to rule. It was about time for that right to be tested.

But they would not be the only group who thought the same.

===


Gallia is about to embark on a new era in RL's history, and there a lot of opportunity for everyone to take a part in it. Her future queen will inherit a nation that has to deal with conflict not only within its borders, but also beyond as it involves itself again with Tellius at large. She will make many changes and decisions for her nation to thrive, but how much of herself can she put for the nation without sacrificing her honor as well? This is a chance for people to pitch in and find out, to help this proud nation of beasts to a new beginning.

With all of that said, this thread is open for recruitment. Other than monarch, there's a lot of positions available, though it isn't necessarily all you can do here. If there's anything else that strikes your fancy and you think is workable here, feel free to post here or contact me personally. Also, all these positions will take effect once my character properly assumes the role of ruler. That should be after the necessary WRP is done, so just keep that in mind when thinking concepts.

===


The King or Queen is the ruler of Gallia. She is responsible for all the local and foreign policies, checked and measured by the advice of her ring and the Council of Elders. She is also the Commander of the Gallian Army.

The Queen has plans to have a Royal Ring of four members to serve as her closest advisors and the main enforcers of her policies. The Royal Ring consists of the Marshal, who represents as Sub-Commander of Gallia's army and deals with matters of warfare, the Chancellor, who handles ambassadors and deals in matters of foreign affairs, the Seneschal, the Chief Justice who enforces the peace at home, and finally the Seer, serving as a spiritual voice and lorekeeper that ensures that the Ring stays true to the Apostle's word and to Soan the Lion Hero's virtues.

The Council of Elders will be in certain need of work once this is all done. Not unlike Circle of Counsel in Goldoa, the ten members of the Council represent the various territories of the nation. Their job is to voice the concerns of their representative regions to the ruler, and in turn ensure the ruler's policies are obeyed. Finally, the Chiefs are the leaders of the various settlements and towns in Gallia, appointed by the Councilors themselves.

The Queen also plans to reorganize the Gallian army into the four War Clans, inspired after the initial clans that formed the nation many years ago. These particular clans are bound not by heritage like the cats, tigers and lions, but by fellowship and their respective strengths. Each clan represents certain aspects of Gallian tactics, but are trained to accommodate most situations they deal with.
  • The Blinding Claw Clan are largely composed of swift cats and tigers, striking fast to flank enemies and draw fire for the stronger clans to punch through.
  • The Razor Tooth Clan are often of tigers and lions for good measure, heavy units that can easily tear through the openings of enemy lines, or storm through a siege with their great strength.
  • The Silent Paw Clan is made up of various beasts (including the stags), often thought as the best hunters in the army. Even more so than the other soldiers, this clan excels in reconnaissance and ambushes, as well as providing magical support through the mystical stags.
  • The Vigil Eye Clan is another mix, serving as a reserve force in time of war. In peacetime, they are the keepers of the law, acting as the local arbiters and defense force in Gallia's various settlements.
The Marshal serves as the Sub-Commander of the army, commanding all four clans and acting as active commander in times of war. The clans are each lead by a Clan-Master, who commands many smaller divisions known as a Pride. The Pride-Captain in turn commands many soldiers, usually counting ten to twenty laguz.

And that's it for now. Have at it.
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Wingman
post Mar 2 2011, 06:50 AM
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I've already given most of my feedback through IM during the planning/concept stages, but I like the way it turned out. Run with it.
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Lysander
post Mar 2 2011, 05:24 PM
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I'm going to be pretty straight to the point here, so I apologize if I sound antagonistic or anything:

The first thing I notice is that you mention terms like Council of Elders without explanation. Maybe link to the wiki or provide some more info on what the Council of Elders was?

Gallia has been 'out of play', so to speak, for quite some time so some reintroduction of what it's all about might be in order. For instance, the tournament thing. I could see some people asking "What tournaments?" as they read it. Might want to include a little blurb about them upon first mention, something about why Gallia uses tournaments to select a new king or why they should be such a big deal to the people.

I'm also a bit fuzzy on the Goldoa stuff. Since Gallia has pretty much never been used IRP and Goldoa was pretty much the same for the longest time I don't know anything about post-game events between the two nations. What made them allies? What made the people so up in arms about the Council not aiding a formerly isolationist country that may or may not have done anything for Gallia ever? As it's written, two messages are being sent: 1) The Gallian people didn't like that the Council couldn't make up their mind with Goldoa and that they did not aid them 2) The Gallian people saw that the Goldoans overthrew the 'power' they didn't like and were driven to do the same to the Council. That first message could use a little bit of explanation and, really, it might do better to focus on 'indecision' over 'lack of aid'. The second message is a strong one, but perhaps one that could be stated even stronger and more overtly.

I also do not know if there is enough information there yet. Looking through it, I'm not sure if I'd be able to make a character off of only that. It sounds like you do plan on adding stuff, but here are a few questions to maybe help guide that: What did the people at large think of your new character's ascension? Is the general opinion 'oh she's strong, she won the tournament, we have to respect and like her' or is there something more there? Then how about the old military? The old government officials? What do they think of the reorganization? Or are they dead? Exiled? Maybe link to wiki articles that are still good to go off of and point out where things are inaccurate to how you want things.

With a little more information and some proofreading though, I think it'll look good.
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Hystrix
post Mar 2 2011, 05:47 PM
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QUOTE(Decus @ Mar 3 2011, 06:24 AM) *
The first thing I notice is that you mention terms like Council of Elders without explanation. Maybe link to the wiki or provide some more info on what the Council of Elders was?

From what I was told, the official situation in Gallia at the moment is that Solan's gone, and there's a Council running things in his absence. I pretty much spun things from there. I believe this Council was referred to in the games as well, but that's just going from second-hand. Anyway, I've clarified their role in the government part of the thread. Their powers have only been corralled a lot by the time my girl takes over, and the royal ring will keep them further in check.

QUOTE
Gallia has been 'out of play', so to speak, for quite some time so some reintroduction of what it's all about might be in order. For instance, the tournament thing. I could see some people asking "What tournaments?" as they read it. Might want to include a little blurb about them upon first mention, something about why Gallia uses tournaments to select a new king or why they should be such a big deal to the people.

I guess so, I'm just a little afraid of explaining too much all at once in the recruitment topic. I don't really want to drive prospects away with an info overload when, as you said, Gallia's been out of play until now.

QUOTE
I'm also a bit fuzzy on the Goldoa stuff. Since Gallia has pretty much never been used IRP and Goldoa was pretty much the same for the longest time I don't know anything about post-game events between the two nations. What made them allies? What made the people so up in arms about the Council not aiding a formerly isolationist country that may or may not have done anything for Gallia ever?

In canon, the Goldoans were the first people that recognized Gallia as a nation. That's a gesture that people simply don't forget, especially when I want to establish a culture that is proud of their history and preserves that knowledge to every generation.

QUOTE
As it's written, two messages are being sent: 1) The Gallian people didn't like that the Council couldn't make up their mind with Goldoa and that they did not aid them 2) The Gallian people saw that the Goldoans overthrew the 'power' they didn't like and were driven to do the same to the Council. That first message could use a little bit of explanation and, really, it might do better to focus on 'indecision' over 'lack of aid'. The second message is a strong one, but perhaps one that could be stated even stronger and more overtly.

I can do that. I'm honestly not versed in the games at all, and from others I get the impression that power in Gallia is decided on strength. It wasn't that Goldoa's rebellion inspired them to fight, so much that it reminded them that fighting is their way.

I think to this situation, the quote in Caineghis's wiki page says it best. "Without a fight now and then, we go a bit strange in the head."

QUOTE
I also do not know if there is enough information there yet. Looking through it, I'm not sure if I'd be able to make a character off of only that. It sounds like you do plan on adding stuff, but here are a few questions to maybe help guide that: What did the people at large think of your new character's ascension? Is the general opinion 'oh she's strong, she won the tournament, we have to respect and like her' or is there something more there? Then how about the old military? The old government officials? What do they think of the reorganization? Or are they dead? Exiled? Maybe link to wiki articles that are still good to go off of and point out where things are inaccurate to how you want things.

Well... I think this is something that can be easily discussed with the folks interested. I did not intend to put in things like the general opinion of the Queen, because technically, she is not queen yet. The WRP I had in mind will detail the takeover, where my character and her posse goes after the council, and fights off every other faction that wants to take the throne for themselves. Everything after will handle the consequences.

But those are good things to ponder about, once all the dust settled. Thank you for your reply, Ly. It's given me a lot to think of.
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post Mar 3 2011, 09:05 PM
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Personally, I would say it does work, as a start. It gives an idea of the political/social climate you're going for, kind of reminds people that Gallia is not actually an aristocracy, and can spark sufficient interest to make someone possibly want to create a character. But they definitely would need more information than just what you're providing here. Maybe add a little note to say that they should contact you with any questions, rather than going to the wiki and getting confused.
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Hystrix
post Mar 3 2011, 09:22 PM
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Yeah, I will definitely make a note to not rely on the wiki for now. I'll work on rebuilding that page sometime next week.
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